chloemorets:

i was telling a joke i made up the other day 

what alcoholic beverage do gay males drink

penis coladas

and i started laughing to myself but my friend just looked me dead in the eyes and said cocktails

(via quxeer)

rlmjob:

crowpse:

I DIDN’T FINDTHE TUMBLR BUT I FOUND “PRETTY GIRLS MAKING UGLY FACES” AND I WAS  CRYING ON THE BUS I WAS LAUGHING SO AHRD 

(Source: tamayomeri, via dafuq)

solluxforpresident:

solluxforpresident:

people think i’m funny because i’m being sassy, but i’m really just being an asshole

(via carkastiel)

get-back-to-hogwarts:

I sometimes feel offended by American stereotypes, but then I remember that we had a nationwide panic when they stopped making Twinkies. 

(via carkastiel)